Sometimes we get bogged down with yes or no questions as we chat with our girls:
- Did you have a good day?
- Did you like the new recipe I made for dinner?
- Was soccer practice fun?
I’ve gotten stuck in this rut before too- my daughter looking blankly back, as I keep trying to dig for more.
But, as she’s grown, I’ve started to realize the power of “if.”
When we’re driving or grocery shopping, waiting in line somewhere or hanging out at the house, I’ll throw out a crazy “if” question.
- IF you could travel anywhere tomorrow where would you go?
- IF you had a thousand dollars to give away, what would you do with it?
These are easy answers for my daughter and they give me the ability to keep the conversation going by simply saying: tell me more, describe what that looks like or asking “How would that make you feel?”
Often times a simple “if” question will take us down the road to a beautiful conversation that reveals something about my daughter’s heart, her dreams, her character, or goals.
As she opens up in these “what if” scenarios, I can often uncover so much more about her joys and struggles, her likes and dislikes, and how she processes and thinks.
Have you ever tried engaging in a “what if” chat with your girl?
If not, here are 10 questions that may inspire a fun and perhaps deeper conversation than you might have imagined!
- If you could design an entire week’s worth of activities, what would your week look like?
- If you could meet one person, who would it be and what questions would you ask them?
- If you could tell all your friends one thing, what would it be?
- If you had to move to a new city, where would you move and what’s the first thing you would do there?
- If you could only have one dessert for the rest of your life, what would you pick?
- If you could create a new ride for a theme park, what would it be and what would you name it.
- If you could only keep 3 things from your bedroom, what would you pick? Why?
- If you got to pick a fun outing for our family, where would we go?
- If you could learn to cook any recipe, what would it be?
- If you had to decide between being a famous movie star or a famous author, which would you choose? What style (book or movie) would you want to be known for?
(Please remember, based on your daughter’s answers you will create some sub-questions that allow her to imagine and explore her own feelings and creativity.)
The goal is to keep it fun, keep it moving, and to be curious! Ask follow up questions and then let her ask some “what if” questions too.
We hope you’ll laugh together, learn together and that you’ll get to know your daughter a little better as you lean into the power of “if!”