On Mother’s Day, it is SO EASY to get disappointed when we aren’t celebrated the way we had hoped. Ron and the girls did a great job – but there are always moments when I let that lie creep in my heart. (Do they really care? Do they really think I’m a good mom?)
We certainly don’t do this job for the awards or the accolades, but it sure does feel nice when our kids come home with that card or poem that share a little line from their heart. They express specifically why they are grateful you are their mom.
There is a tiny voice in a all of us of doubt. A voice of insecurity. Even though I write about it – it doesn’t mean I don’t wonder if I’m doing enough or getting it right or wrong. Trust me – I have all of the feelings you do.
Mother’s Day insecurity led me to think about GRATITUDE and how it matters so much. I do not want to live for the approval of others or the words of others. I believe it’s a natural feeling that rises up in all of us. So, could gratitude change the posture of my heart? And could expressing gratitude help heal those wounds in others? Since we are all feeling it?
This week also came during a vulnerable spot for me when I launched a project into the world that meant so much to me. My new Treasured Study (in collaboration with Parent Cue) is way more than just another thing for me. It’s something I have been testing and dreaming about for years. I truly believe our girls deeply need to know their worth and need to connect with their moms and it was a project I tried to quit over and over again. And God would not let up. So, when it finally was done – there was a lot of emotions.
So, last week it came out and much like Mother’s Day or our birthday – those days matter so much to US – and sometimes the world around us just keeps moving and doesn’t notice as much as we hoped. SO MANY did notice – don’t get me wrong. However, there were quiet, insecure moments when lies creeped in… and I started to notice the lack of support or friends that withheld support over the overwhelming love that was present. I started to make it about approval versus gratitude. This is a common cycle with creative folks like me – we just don’t admit it publicly.
Lord, reposition my heart. I GET to do this. I GET to be a mom. I GET to write this book. I GET to … Let me let go of my desire for praise (even when it feels good) and let go of the lack of support (even when it hurts so bad). Let me keep my eye on you. Let me keep my eye on all that has happened.
So, this is where I am today. I am fighting the lies like all you. I know that I matter as a mom. And that my work with Treasured matters. I know the truth is that my family supports me as a mom and that I am beyond blessed with support for my projects. The enemy wants me knocked down and quiet in my house pouting. He wants me feeling like a failure.
Lord, I know that I am loved, known and seen by you. And that is enough. Let me hold tight to your will for my life. Let my work be pleasing to you alone. Let me glorify you with all that you’ve given me.
So, I’m getting back up with a heart full of gratitude because I am grateful. The Lord allowed me, broken Court, to be a mom, to be a writer … and more when I deserve so much less.
And… I’ll end with an idea. A very practical idea.
As I thought about gratitude. I thought how GREAT it does feel when our hearts hear affirming words. Yes, we all need to lean on the Lord for that affirmation, but as a body of Christ, He CAN use his people to affirm those around us.
What if we are the ones that remind our teachers of their worth at the end of this year? I whipped up this sheet for my girls yesterday and you are welcome to use and edit. Copy and paste and make it your own. Remind your teachers WHY they matter. This will be better than any gift card or coffee mug they can get. They are tired and weary and wondering if the entire year mattered.
Let’s be the ones that took a minute to choose to say it. Let’s not withhold our words. Let’s choose to celebrate the women around us and say what we need to say.
Thank you so much to EVERY SINGLE one of you that emailed, texted, DMed, shared and ordered Treasured. You truly did make my week. And I am honored that you are behind this project.
And be sure to thank the teachers that weren’t perfect or your favorite. They all did their best. We can find the best in every human and be grateful for how they showed up for our kids.